There’s this lyric from a song I absolutely love called “How He Loves” that goes “and heaven meets Earth like an unforeseen kiss and my heart turns violently inside of my chest”. For the longest time, I couldn’t quite discern why this line struck such a deep chord inside my heart… and then it hit me. This lyric, to me, is the actual, tangible feeling of vulnerability. That violent turning inside of our chests when we are vulnerable or are receiving vulnerability that may even cause a bit of discomfort. But oh, how powerful and beautiful that feeling can be.
There’s this author & psychologist I adore named Brené Brown who says that “vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.” She also says that vulnerability “sounds like truth and feels like courage”. Her words over the past few years of my life have transformed me. Her words gave me the courage to be vulnerable enough to start this blog.
See, here’s the thing. It’s easy to go through life and shy away from vulnerability. I know because for so long I did. It was easy to build up a wall of steel around my heart and never share anything hard or real or raw going on in my head, heart, or life. When my parents got divorced, you want to know how many people I told for the first year? One. Not even some of my closest friends new. Because to reveal that I was hurting and life was hard during that season meant being vulnerable. It meant giving a piece of my heart to people that could possibly hurt me.
But you know what was even harder than being so gosh darn guarded and feeling like I had to hide myself? Not being vulnerable enough to step fully into who I was & what was happening in my life & what God was calling me to do with my story.
Staying guarded felt like the easiest option at the time, but eventually, it became excruciatingly difficult. Why? Because I never felt fully known or fully connected with the people around me. I had so much in my head & heart that I wanted to share, but I was painfully scared of revealing those pieces of myself.
So, what exactly does vulnerability look like? It’s not just sharing your deepest fears with anyone and everyone you meet (which, honestly, is probably not the most prudent thing to do with people who are not in your inner circle…we are also called to have boundaries!).
It’s saying “I love you” first.
It’s starting a blog.
It’s trying out for the soccer team when you don’t know if you’ll make it.
It’s sharing with someone that you need more love from them.
It’s asking for help and letting your pride down.
It’s admitting you aren’t perfect and life isn’t all together.
The list goes on & on. But ultimately, vulnerability–it’s fully living. Truly, fully living.
You guys, I can’t even begin to describe how important it is that we all embrace vulnerability. Vulnerability is what gives us deep, meaningful connection. It’s a measure of the courage within us. Being vulnerable is being brave. And I don’t know about you. but I don’t just want to live an easy, safe life– I want a brave, wild adventure!
Always,
Elle
